Power Exchange vs. Power Struggle

Posted: July 28, 2010 in Dominance, Power Exchange, Submission

To those in the scene, the term power exchange is fairly commonplace.
Full understanding of the term is less common, but still a larger majority than our vanilla counterparts.
For those that are lucky enough to have experienced it, there is nothing like it.

Some might say that since I am in a 24/7 Master/slave relationship that we are in a constant exchange of power.
I do not agree with that on many levels but primarily because sometimes life causes you to go on auto-pilot,
and to me power exchange has to be a conscious effort from all involved parties.

I’m not here to debate the topic of power exchange,
I’m writing today to decipher between a power exchange versus power struggle.

I recently read a blog post called The Truth About Cats and Dogs,
First of all, it was like a light bulb went off – such a fantastic analogy of submission types.
Second of all, it solidified what role I take as a slave and more importantly
it made me also realize what type of s-type we would be willing to add to our dynamic at some point in the future.

The reason I mention this particular writing is because I’ve been struggling with words,
words to explain why a recent relationship failed, despite countless attempts to salvage it.
Now, in my mind, it’s as easy as they were a cat, I am a dog, and we are dog owners.
Strange, perhaps – but I task you with reading the post – I promise it will make sense then.

But this brings me to a little bit more discussion about the differences between cats and dogs.
You see, I think when playing with their own species – power exchange happens relatively freely.
Very little effort is involved for the dynamic to flow from owner to pet (and vice versa) as they tend to see eye to eye in their given role.
However, when forced to interact outside of their species, power exchange becomes more of a power struggle.

Perhaps some D-types enjoy a struggle; the challenge to perhaps take-down, capture, overwhelm or overpower another.
Well, that’s definitely not me and most certainly not Sir.
We are both of the school that submission is a gift, given freely without resistance.
And in return, a person makes themselves available to receive whatever form of control is brought upon them
and only in that peaceful relinquishment of control would they truly experience our energy exchange, our power exchange.

  1. mollyskiss says:

    Very interesting post. I agree whole heartedly that my submission is a gift given freely and completely to one who is worthy of it. It is not his to wrestle from me but mine to give and once given it is his to use as he sees fit. However, I do enjoy a struggle from time to time, does my need to be physically over powered constitute a power strugge?



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